Just because a narcissist is nice to you doesn’t mean they are to be real. A narcissist is a self-serving manipulative person.
If a narcissist is nice to you, it may not mean what you think. I’m just being blunt. They probably don’t care about you as much as they advertise. There is usually an underlying reason for their good behavior that revolves around a selfish gain from their actions. It’s a tough pill to swallow. I get it.
If a narcissist is nice to you, be careful.
Narcissists can be scary. And it’s not always because of physical fear. The level of manipulation what this toxic person uses can have devastating consequences for your mental health and your future. So today we’re going to look at the real reason why a narcissist plays the kindness card or uses a facade to win you over.
Here are a few reasons why a narcissist might be good to you.
1. They have narcissistic supply
Never forget that a narcissist always “must have”provide“. Their source of supply must be willing to pay attention to them and praise them for simple tasks. Otherwise, they will collapse.
A narcissist thrives on the loyalty of others. So if a narcissist is being nice to you, they may be doing it to maintain their supply. If they feel like you’re doing something for yourself, they’ll love bomb you back.
2. They love bomb you
when talking about love bombhere’s another reason why a narcissist is good for you. At first, this toxic person will shower you with gifts, compliments and compliments. They understand that they need to make you fall in love with them quickly to ensure their narcissistic supply. And when you do, they gradually reduce their positive behavior.
It’s called a love bomb, and it’s a trick.
3. “Tit for tat” mentality
This is when a narcissist does nice things to leave you feeling guilty in the future. What I’m saying is that they do something thoughtful enough for you that they can use in arguments later.
A narcissist is notorious for bringing up things in the past that make them look good and make you look bad. If you do something that hurts them or say no to them, they say:
“I’ve done all the good things for you, and look how you’re responding to me.”
Does this sound familiar?
4. They make you dependent on them
A narcissist really likes you they retain control. For example, they might say:
“You don’t have to work, I’ll take care of you”.
It’s designed to rob you of your independence, so it’s harder to leave them when you understand who they are. This is a calculated move that most narcissists develop early on. This is often woven into the love bomb they use. And if you decide to take care of them, they rarely keep their promises.
5. They’re trying to get you back
When a narcissist sees you identified themthey do a thing or two. Either they switch to another provider or try to get you back. And if they try to get you back, they go above and beyond with cute gestures.
While some people really want to change their relationship, a narcissist wants to keep you around because you are usually very sympathetic. Empathy is something a narcissist loves to eat.
6. They want others to see them
One of the reasons a narcissist is nice to you is because they want others to see what they’re doing. To those who do not know the truth about them, they appear to be kind and considerate individuals.
As you can see, a narcissist can be kind, but they choose to use kindness as another part of their activities. Kindness to them is as fake as they are. Unless you live with a narcissist or live in the past, you cannot see how bad their actions are.
Why are they like that?
A narcissist lost his true identity early in life. Due to various forms of abuse, these toxic individuals have come to believe that manipulative and self-serving behavior is normal. It is not. They are usually victims childhood neglector being subjected to verbal and emotional abuse by their parents or other relatives.
BUT, it is not your responsibility to fix them. Because, firstly, it is very difficult to encourage them to undergo treatment. They deny what they are doing, and on top of that, they claim you have a problem. They can also convince others that you have a problem too. So, they can be dangerous people who will ruin your life.
And I know some of you care deeply about the narcissist. But if you’re not be careful when dealing with themtheir behavior can damage your self-esteem and your overall mental health and well-being. These problems can lead to physical health problems in some cases.
So maybe you can offer to ask them for help, but don’t let them change how you feel about yourself. Be strong and walk away from them if you have to.
Sending you all the love on your journey.
Staff writer at Studying the mind
Sherry Heard is a professional writer and illustrator with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and various forms of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherry manages several mental illnesses including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder and PTSD. With this knowledge and personal experience, she strives to help others overcome trauma and abuse, overcome mental illness, and heal over time.
