In the TV series Ted Lasso, “We’re talking about practice. Not a game. Not a game. We’re talking about a practice,” Allen Iverson’s titular character quips during his famous press conference. Lasso was trying to get his star player to understand the importance of training.
Well, when it comes to some social networks TikTok and Instagram influencers also talk about practice — in this case, practice dates. Not a real date if you already have a crush on someone. Not “The Date” with someone running to be “The One”. They’re talking about meeting people you’re not that good at for the main purpose of having dating practice. This is to sharpen your dating skills for the real dates that matter more. So the question is, do you play the practice of going on dates just for practice?
The logic behind practice dates
Having more practice will help you better deal with the butterflies you’ll experience when you’re actually dating someone. You know when you forget things like your ability to speak and your name. These butterflies can grow to the size of Butterball chickens if you’ve picked them and haven’t had many dates in a while.
Practice will also help you improve dating skills that you don’t use regularly, especially the ones where I don’t know much about you yet and apply it beyond your face and body and pretend you don’t like drama. This includes the ability to speak small, flirtingI’m-so-sexy-dressing-my-mush-my-man, and planning dates. Because of this, those who are just re-entering the dating arena after years of long-term relationships may not seem like the leg-warmers at today’s party.
Also, not everyone is the same when it comes to these dating skills. While some may be natural schmoozers, others may need more practice. And good dating skills aren’t necessarily dependent on good relationship skills. Take, for example, a woman I dated who admitted to being good at dating but bad at relationships. Yes, take it.
Adapting to the range of dating (and human) behavior
This brings another potential benefit of getting more hands-on dating. This will help you be more flexible in choosing different symbols and flags, including red, green and beige. The more different dates you go on, the more repetitive behaviors you may notice love to bang, border push, falsification in the futureand the blame game and get used to identifying and resolving them.
Then there’s that hot take – more dating can turn off even those you thought were hot at first. Getting to know different types of people makes you more aware that superficial appearances don’t necessarily equate to things that may be more important to long-term relationships, such as compatible personalities, kindness, intelligenceand core values. People can take you in different directions, and any given date can go completely differently than you originally intended.
How to get to practice dates
Speaking of which, intent is what separates the practice date from the “real” date. On the surface, a practice date can be anything a real date can be, except for the intention to practice a little. You’ve chosen to date someone you wouldn’t normally choose because they somehow didn’t meet your screening criteria. Maybe this person didn’t have the right looks, background or what it takes to make the cut and ended up on your training squad instead.
But whether it’s sports, playing an instrument, singing, baking fruitcake, public speaking, or dating, the key to getting good practice at anything is to simulate playtime as much as possible. This means doing everything you normally do to practice your skills.
It also means training with decent people who aren’t huge parts of what you know. Again, the goal is to practice dating skills, not argument, fight, or flight skills. So, best practice dates are people who seem very decent, but don’t put your back on fire for whatever reason.
What can happen on the date of the operation
When you go on an internship date, you can get exactly what you’re looking for—practice. We are talking about practice. Not a game. Not a game. And it’s still good for all the reasons mentioned above.
However, a funny thing can happen when you are just “practicing”. You might actually be more game to connect with people. Your guard may be down. The pressure may be off because you don’t think this person is vying for your heart. It can leave you more open to being yourself and open to more opportunities and seeing people in a different light.
Consider this example. Someone recently told me that when he first met a longtime crush, he was turned off. The lack of interest then gave her the attitude that I’ll talk about whatever I want on the date, no matter what. After several hours of free-flowing conversation, he began to realize that he was more interesting than he thought, and that they actually had a lot in common.
So going on practice dates can actually be a way to relax your dating criteria in a good way. It can bring you closer to people who would never have been part of your dating game day. And maybe it’ll help you lasso better, or you’ll end up being lassoed by someone who’s right for you.
